As her language skills flower, your toddler will also try out her competence as a talker. Not all of what she has to say will be interesting, and often she will want to talk when you are terribly busy. Nevertheless, it is vitally important to her feelings of self worth that you set aside your duties and distractions and devotes some period of time every day simply listening to what she has to say. The same sorts of connections that were important when you played with her in her first months of life apply here. Show her that she has your full attention with eye contact, touching, and a hug when the spirit moves you. Treat her questions and opinions with respect; if you think wrong information could get her into difficulties, and be tolerant of a large measure of joyous fantasy and exaggeration.
When your child reveals her feelings about herself or others, let her talk freely as you listen carefully, showing that you truly understand by the things that you say in response. If your three year old tells you she feels like throwing the bay in the garbage can you can acknowledge her feelings, her right to express them and your understanding by saying,’ wow- you must really be angry.