Building self Esteem

Most experts agree that a person’s self esteem – the measure of how he feels about himself- is the cornerstone of personal adjustment throughout life. A child begins early to seek answers to the fundamental questions “Am I lovable?” and “Am I worthwhile?” If the responses he receives from the people around him suggest that he is loved, wanted and capable, the chances are good that he will develop the same positive attitudes toward himself.

  This sense of his own worth will find quiet expression in all aspects of his behavior. A child armed with high self esteem will approach other people with trust, and view the world as a safe place where, most of the time his emotional and physical needs will be satisfied.  Like the “Little Engine that Could.” He will face challenges with optimism, propelled by self confidence to succeed as a winner in school, among his peers, and eventually in the countless contests of adult life. His opposite ,on the other hand- the youngster who has been told in a thousand subtle ways that he is not always loved, not entirely wanted, not clever enough to succeed on his own- will likelihood to be driven to take the low , slow road, risking little and gaining still less.

Not surprisingly, the child receives his first notions about his self worth from his parents: They are his chief link to the external world throughout his early years, the mirrors in which he sees himself and his efforts reflected. A caring mother and father should examine the ways they handle their child and make sure their manner communicates positive messages and images- reflections that will enhance rather than undermine the child’s sense of possibilities. It also important for parents to broadcast positive messages about their own self worth; a child learns best by example, and is far more likely to develop high self esteem if he has grown up models to follow.